Pregnant lady fights off an intruder who was wielding [a tiki torch] There’s a Smores Bar in Foggy Bottom [stop everything] More lanes aren’t going to help anything [traffic on I-95] Set of twins are born both minutes and a year apart [new year’s baby] Arlington wants tech start ups …

How to Go Against Norms in DC: 1) Unsubscribe from All Morning Newsletters Why the hell are the writers of morning email distributions so obsessed with waking you up everyday at or earlier than 6 a.m.?!   2) Live Far, Far Away from a Metro Line Who needs to wait …

Memo To: WMATA, the guys who hand out the 37 different free papers at Metro Stations and the GW Kids Trying to Sell Me Krispy Kremes From: Ticked Off Metro Rider Re: You Suck … Every morning, I get up, take care of the assorted rituals that make me acceptable …