With the new Congress boasting 71 female members, it was only a matter of time.  [powder room] House Speaker-to-be John Boehner is planning to install the first-ever women’s restroom next to the floor of the House of Representatives. Previous to this, the closest restroom for the ladies has been at …

This is beyond fantastic:  [boozy ape] A Russian chimpanzee has been sent to rehab by zookeepers to cure the smoking and beer-drinking habits he has picked up, a popular daily reported on Friday. It gets even better: “The beer and cigarettes were ruining him. He would pester passers-by for booze,” …

This is what happens when you let your boss live-blog: For instance, Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-N.Y.), who spent Thursday live blogging on Daily Kos, offered a more candid assessment of the Republicans at summit. “I think Leader Boehner is particularly livid about the tanning bed tax,” Weiner wrote. “Surprised he …

Hug someone today. Tell a loved one what they mean to you. Each day is a gift. Politico: Boehner chief of staff dies at 46

Even boozing can be political… During [yesterday’s] WH meeting with cong. leaders, Obama said he saw House Min. Leader John Boehner "drinking egg nog" at this week’s cong. holiday party. Boehner responded: "I was drinking wine". [pool report] h/t Last Call

The Onion: Congressman Boehner’s Terror Alert Skin Set Back To Orange

Our guess: “Just like Steel said: Look serious, concentrate, lean in for the shot.”

Glenn Thrush: Summers brushes back Boehner It’s always about the jobs

Personally, we think this story is chicken —–.

Hollywood Hits Washington [Emily Leaman ] In Case of Emergency [Hammer ] City Council [free Nats tickets ] Third Eye Blind [Cooley ]

Forced to cut words. This doesn’t happen often, but Boehner’s entire quote Thursday was almost shorter than the release’s title. TITLE: Boehner Statement on President-Elect Obama’s Selection of Rep. Rahm Emanuel as White House Chief of Staff … QUOTE: “This is an ironic choice for a President-elect who has promised …

House Minority Leader Boehner: Minority Leader John Boehner nearly choked up as he begged his Republican colleagues to vote “in the best interest of their country” for the bailout bill. … Admitting that the outcome is in “serious doubt,” an impassioned Boehner implored his colleagues to cast aside politics — and …

Rogers and O’Connor: Boehner and Pelosi’s First date

Pershing: Pots, Kettles and Earmarks Bres: Hoyer blasts Republicans on earmark moratorium Pershing: Bush Hits on Stimulus, Earmark Reform As an aside, press releases “reacting” to the speech from left and right have been rolling in for a couple of hours, but Capitol Briefing can’t share them with you because …

Bres: House Republicans call for moratorium on earmarks EE: House Republicans Know How to Play the Game Lewis: Breaking: GOP Leadership Proposes Earmark Moratorium Pear: House Republicans Urge Earmark Moratorium JK: House GOP shelves earmark moratorium plan, seeks bipartisan panel AP: House GOP Proposes Earmarks Moratorium Gavin: Reporters Covering the …