Alexander Ovechkin could be Mayor of DC by this time next week if he keeps this up. [C-A-P-S]

From the only news source we pay any attention to: [the Onion] NEW YORK —Addressing reporters yesterday in an unnervingly calm tone of voice, NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman—his hands, face, and white-collared shirt covered in blood—said that any obstacle standing in the way of both Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin …