Politico’s Erika Lovley: Jason Chaffetz: Ax Hill staff tax cheats

Funny or Die’s Presidential Reunion from Will Ferrell

Days after he announced to the nation that he had high cholesterol, President Obama enjoyed a heart healthy meal. [fried chicken] The only thing missing from his meal — Lipitor.

The Atlantic: Gay Marriage Clears Final Hurdle In the District Of Columbia At midnight tonight, same-sex marriage will be legal in the District of Columbia.

If this doesn’t get you excited to vote in Texas, nothing will. h/t Liz Mair

Rep. Paul Broun on the dozens of dead animals in his congressional office: “I’ve eaten everything in this office.” Even better: “If I’m going to shoot it, I’m going to eat it.” This video is part of Roll’s Calls revamped Office Space series.  Solid work by the Roll Call team.

He’s just like most Americans – he goes for the burger, not the salad. [eat for today] He [Gibbs] joked, “All you guys think he eats carrots and celery – and there’s more cheeseburgers, fries and pie than you previously knew. You guys thought he, like, carried arugula in his …

Congrats to our friend Shannon on her new gig at House Financial Services. Mike Allen’s Playbook: EXCLUSIVE: The Herald Group’s Shannon Flaherty will soon be returning to the Hill to serve as Deputy Chief of Staff for Communications for the House Financial Services Committee (Republicans). Flaherty, who previously served as …

People: Bill Clinton Offered His Support to Tiger Woods Former President Bill Clinton offered his support to Tiger Woods in a phone call with the embattled golf star, a spokesman for the former president confirms. NY Post: App Covers Your Tiger Tail Want to cheat on your spouse, but not …

Just asking … NY Post: WHICH members of Congress make regular, secret visits to Cuba as guests of Fidel Castro, flying in from nearby islands? Their passports aren’t stamped, so no one’s the wiser.

Did you have nightmares about gigantic inflatable Canadian Mounties and beavers taking over the world? [closing ceremonies] What a run for USA Hockey! Our boys played their hearts out to earn a silver medal and gained millions of new fans in the process [Canada wins] But keep your head up …

This will probably make Coach Joe Barton’s day. Former Atlanta Braves pitcher, John Smoltz, is rumored to be gearing up for a Congressional campaign. Smoltz is on the short list of candidates who may run for the House seat John Linder is vacating. Atlanta Journal-Constitution: John Smoltz, United States Congressman? …

Specter to Sestak: You don’t pay your staff enough money. Senator Arlen Specter’s campaign on Thursday sharply criticized primary opponent Congressman Joe Sestak (D-7) for paying his campaign staff salaries that often amount to less than the minimum wage, and for wide pay disparities between the three siblings that work …

A Girl Named Bong: Sarah Jessica Parker hangs at the White House h/t MK

For those of you who’d rather not be at work, you’re not alone. Insert Charlie Rangel.