#NATIONAL ~shark week~; RIP Robin Williams, we will miss you; Newsflash: 23 million of Twitter’s ‘active users’ are bots; #DISTRICT Jayson Werth drives. Fast.; Yes, the Pokémon World Championships is in DC this weekend; Mid-August that feels like Mid-October makes us feel some type of way; Anyone else overindulging in #RestaurantWeek?;  …

#NATIONAL Most hated college football teams in each state; Cat + smart collar = free wifi; Amazon is actually serious about drone package delivery; Peter Frampton literally takes matters into his own hands; Aesop Rock > Shakespeare; stressed? listen to a bodega cat; Hunter Pence trolling is the best and …

#NATIONAL Did someone just call double-stuffed Oreos gauche?; Amazon will offer you a dollar to take their slower delivery service; surely we don’t need reading glasses yet, but when we do…; Goin’ to Mars again y’all; who watched Sharknado 2?; Named Skywalker? No passport for you; dollar dollar bill; pay …

#NATIONAL #DarthVader2016; 100 days until the election, can you make it?; Summer Vortex > Polar Vortex; Yelp trends: Chicken or the egg?; Nope nope nope nope; Could a Sharknado actually happen?; Type /ponystream into your gchat, just do it; Don’t just adopt a pet, adopt a best friend; there’s an out-of-control satellite …

#NATIONAL Forbes sold their majority stake to Integrated Whale Media Investments, which just sounds like a practical joke; Whoa Microsoft, whoa; Silvio Berlusconi’s still got it; Congress wants us to go to another moon; origami spacecraft; taking endless appetizers way past an appropriate limit; swimsuit contest + insulin pump = …

If a rainbow shows up in DC and wasn’t Instagrammed 12,000 times – did it really happen? #NATIONAL Do you love dogs and weapons? Then the TSA’s Instagram is for you; Emmy nominations: who got robbed?; If soccer injuries were real life; we’re irrationally peeved about this guy and his …

#AMERICA Happy Independence Day; here’s 7,000 fireworks exploding at once; Are you doing anything to celebrate America? If not, please choose an activity or read the Declaration of Independence you communist; We’re now at our furthest distance from the sun today; Your fireworks brought to you courtesy of China; We …

#NATIONAL The US lost their game and advance in the World Cup — perfect gif for this; 22 Jump Street = worth seeing; Huffington Post UK wins the world’s competition for clever headlines this week; #DISTRICT D.C. taxis … seriously guys?;Congressional leaders held hands and were super awkward; Democrats win …

 If you didn’t sweat through your suit jacket, it was a good day It’s been a long week; our hearts go out to Sen. Kirk’s office; The $4.95 lobbyist; DC crime, and so forth; that time Congress helped make smoking look sexy; Sorry babes (of the Bad News variety); Apparently …

 What a low key week. #NATIONAL We want this fountain somewhere in DC; the government is auctioning off bitcoins; a 70 year old man was crushed by a garage door; Mad cow is back; fairweather Heat fans; evolution of Dad dancing; bachelor party SKULL fun; 7-11 jumped the shark; don’t …

#NATIONAL D-Day in photos; This 93 year old man is parachuting into Normandy again in full dress; And just one more D-Day story for you; Don’t make Kevin Spacey go all Frank Underwood on your ass; Will Obama wrestle a bear next?; Those curls are intimidating the world; And yet, …

#NATIONAL Sucks to tie the National Spelling Bee; also this fail broke our hearts last night; but this one made us laugh; #Basketballmer; TL;DNR; 50 cent threw out a bad pitch but Wonkblog threw back a good infographic; Google’s version of  a self driving car sounds like a death trap; …

#NATIONAL Will Kanye West play only Kanye West songs at his wedding?; #SnowdenSelfie; Umm … Tennessee?; Rent or buy?; Glassholes strike again; Donkeys have BFFs; stock up on garlic oil for your usual swampy summer; Will Ferrell/RCP drum-off; Vintage drum-off h/t Mike Dankler; Pretend you’re in college again and get …

Meet our new editor, Jill Abramson #NATIONAL OMG WTF: Texting 911; All offers, sport or otherwise, should also address your pet; Kevin Spacey kills it in his Call of Duty monologue; Say happy birthday to the man who gave us Facebook even though he’s an old loser now; Nintendo Game …

#NATIONAL  Call your momma on Sunday; So… Is Clay Aiken heading to Congress?; “He Monica Lewinsky-ed all on my gown”; the 2014 Football Duke’s Mock Draft and Diary; Is Katie Couric going back to Today?; Net Neutrality huh? Well, seeya later; Missed connections for a-holes; How’d your NFL team do …