A new CNET article wants to know: "As Facebook works its way toward a probable IPO, the big question is: how can it show it can make money? Well, one way–and I’m not the first to suggest it–would be to charge a nominal monthly fee. With that in mind, I …

Fat People Cause Global Warming: Fat Isn’t Very Green [insert salad bar]

From the only news source we pay any attention to: [the Onion] NEW YORK —Addressing reporters yesterday in an unnervingly calm tone of voice, NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman—his hands, face, and white-collared shirt covered in blood—said that any obstacle standing in the way of both Sidney Crosby and Alexander Ovechkin …

Mario Lavandeira, aka Perez Hilton, invokes the c-word from his pageant rage. Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Has Chris Frates broken the record for most Lil Wayne references while covering Congress and lobbying? Can someone please stack his desk with one dollar bills and send a picture via the tip line?  [making it rain]

Here’s the worst kept secret ever:  Don Henley doesn’t care for Republicans. The latest proof: Don Henley is suing a Republican candidate for the U.S. Senate in California, claiming he has brazenly ripped off two really popular Henley songs to push his campaign to unseat California Senator Barbara Boxer. We …

Honesty in Facebook status updates [something we can appreciate] Craig: My legs burn from all the hiking this past weekend because I’m a fat bastard! Good work, Craig. Bonus points for not using "LOL". [contact-form 3 "Facebook Alerts"]

Via Patrick Gavin’s Twitter account:  [settle] There’s a special place in hell 4 people who email via Facebook. Was regular email (u know the one listed on my page) not working out for u? Noted.

Very creative brand name [MOM]

When you’re as bad as the Washington Nationals, you try to cut corners wherever you can.  By leaving out the "O" on their jerseys, the team saved nearly $12 per jersey. [genius] Our advice to the worst team in baseball: You may also think about eliminating the "A, T, N, …

In all caps, @oprah writes on her brand new Twitter account: HI TWITTERS . THANK YOU FOR A WARM WELCOME. FEELING REALLY 21st CENTURY . @PatrickRuffini’s classic response … The moment Twitter jumped the shark. We know she had a thing for Skype, but why ruin Twitter?  [Oh well, it …

Yesterday we posted about these dueling billboards from Audi and BMW that turned up on Santa Monica Blvd. Well, photshoppers quickly got to work in what they felt would be appropriate counter responses.  Seen here . In the spirit of Photoshop Friday, we decided to take create our very own …

Facebook Status Abuse: Craig is going hiking with Tammy but can’t stop checking his blackberry! He is such a slave to work! Craig, the "Douchebag Parade" called, they’re hoping you could join them as the Grand Marshal. Are you friends abusers? [contact-form 3 "Facebook Alerts"]

Memo To: WMATA, the guys who hand out the 37 different free papers at Metro Stations and the GW Kids Trying to Sell Me Krispy Kremes From: Ticked Off Metro Rider Re: You Suck … Every morning, I get up, take care of the assorted rituals that make me acceptable …

Something tells us that this shouldn’t really qualify as breaking news. —– Original Message —– From: CNN Breaking News <[email protected] > To: FamousDC Sent: Fri Apr 17 02:17:39 2009 Subject: CNN Breaking News — Ashton Kutcher is first to reach 1 million followers in Twitter contest with CNN.