Unless you enjoy reading this kind of thing, this might be the most helpful thing you read all day. Sometimes nothing but two slices of American on white bread will do, but if your grilled cheese craving is slightly more ambitious, consider these fancy-pants options from around the metro area. …

Arnold Schwarzenegger is thinking about reinventing his movie career [age appropriate of course] The “kill switch” is all the rage [how do we get one?] Why we love the internet [robocop] Funniest First Lady ever [Barbs]

It’s hard letting go of 150,000 followers… @Almacy: Jay Carney hosts first WH press briefing, yet @PressSec still feeling nostalgic. http://twitpic.com/40i0i4 h/t @Almacy

You’ll need to take a shower after reading this Roll Call article about Rick Santorum’s Google problem. [donkey punch] Santorum can only hope voters don’t turn to Google, the world’s most popular Internet search engine, to learn more about him. Try it for yourself: Enter “Rick Santorum” into Google. In …

If you’re like Michele Bachmann and have been freaking out about leaked TSA photos, this should put your mind at ease. According to Gawker, “the Senate voted 98-0 today yesterday in favor of an amendment “that would punish anyone who misuses images from full-body security scanners at airports with a …

Obama flubs lowest “share,” so it sounds like he says sh*t in the presser. NOTE: This is exactly how press conferences should go.

Everything about this, including the headline, is weird. [unarmed robbery] 400-pound woman caught shoplifting when motorized cart gets stuck at Rochester Hills Meijer … police use Taser to subdue her Yes, she was in an electric buggy and they used a taser.

Just when we thought the lines would get shorter.  [icing] Katherine Kallanis and Sophie LaMontagne, the sisters who own Georgetown Cupcake, kicked off season two of their TLC show “D.C. Cupcakes” with a special premiere screening. Of course, Sunday night’s festivities at Yachad’s Our City Film Festival also included a …

Exclusive: Madeleine Albright playing drums last night at the Kennedy Center [jams] There’s nothing funny about this, except for the fact that it’s funny [400 pound shoplifter] The Sports Illustrated Swim Suit Edition cover has been released [Hawaii] Computers aren’t smarter than us [yet] Sweet Valentine’s Video for Rep. Giffords …

Last night during a Chris Botti concert at the Kennedy Center, Madeleine Albright took to the stage to play the drums.  We knew the Madam Secretary was talented, but not this talented. [leather skirt] h/t Nathan Imperiale

Truck Farm is a simple concept with a big impact. It’s a traveling, edible exhibit that brings a rural experience to urban students. The Truck Farm project advances the notion that growing a bit of one’s food can be fun, easy and rewarding. In an effort to enhance the educational …

CQ Roll Call proved victorious at today’s Diet Coke charity capture the flag competition at the Georgetown Law Center.  According to attendees, CQ Roll Call smoked both National Journal and a team of Congressional staffers to win $10,000 for a charity of their choosing.  A dozen or so reporters played …

DCCC’s video response to a week of CPAC [middle ages] Chris Lee’s old campaign ad is telling [shirts optional] Come on down Jay Carney, you’re the next contestant [good luck] The cost of Valentine’s Day [infographic] Cupid’s Undie Run

CPAC has not jumped the shark? [We love Dale] Pic provided by Emily Miller

Well-deserved ink: National Journal: “Matt Lira is the social media alter ego for House Majority Leader Eric Cantor, VA.” Matt Lira is one of the most polished digital minds on Capitol Hill and has played a critical role in helping to advance the House of Representatives online.  He’s also the …