If nothing else, it’s funny [shock GSA video] Nine signs your campaign dream is over [Yahoo] I love my Mega Millions lottery ticket [at work] Park’s Hardware saved for another day [H St.] By Mike Nally  

Live coverage of the Masters [feed] Metro launches anti-groping campaign [no touchy] We’ll take RG3 [no Luck] Nats open in Chi-town [Strasburg] By Mike Nally

Barry was feeling good after his win last night. Southeast going HAM on Twitter!Let me hear YOU! — Marion S. Barry, Jr. (@marionbarryjr) April 4, 2012  

Want to land great seats to popular musicals? Read FamousDC. Congrats to @IsseV who won the FamousDC giveaway and a pair of Brother Russia tickets.

Drudge pokes fun at Ricky [again] Thanks Steve J [Quora] Pole dancing is expensive in DC [stay still] Obama locks up Star Trek vote [photo]

Here’s a great conversation starter at parties: I was let go at my last job because I hired a clown. [WaPo] The chief of the General Services Administration is resigning and two of her top deputies have been fired amid reports of excessive spending at a training conference at a …

Rasika West End opens [amazing] Metro fights sexual harassment [NBC] Capitol Hemp closes [snuffed] Million Mustache March [demands stache stimulus] One of the greatest traditions in sports [one shining moment]

UPDATE: 1st place: Stever Orr 2nd place: Mary Beal 3rd place: Tommy Nguyen Thanks everyone who participated in our bracket challenge with ClotureClub. Winners will be announced at half time of Wednesday’s trivia at Capitol Lounge. (winners don’t need to be there) 1st prize $100 gift certificate to Cap Lounge …

Big news in Cantorland. [via Politico] Veteran Republican operative Doug Heye is joining Majority Leader Eric Cantor’s press office as deputy chief of staff. Heye, who was most recently an adviser to the Iowa Republican party, fills the spot of Brad Dayspring, who left the Virginia Republican’s office and joined …

There are three guarantees if you work on Capitol Hill: Doris, over-zealous interns, and occasional random questioning from Jim Billimoria. JB, as he’s known on the Hill, has spent the last four years working for Ways and Means. Today, Jim says goodbye to Capitol Hill. Good luck, Jim.

If nothing else, at least he’s honest [We Love Biden] Sheldon gives up on Newt [no dice] Members ask for FB help [Timeline deadline] Weed store grows in DC [here we go] Everyone needs more FB friends [sponsor] By MUDSUGAR  

The Washington Post recently held their Peeps Diorama Contest: Experience scenes starring those sugary little marshmallows depicting historic events, pop culture, politics and more. This year’s winner was “OccuPeep DC” for its detailed rendering of the Occupy DC encampment at McPherson Square. Other top dioramas include: “GOPeeps Peepidential Debate”, “Peepius …

We’re not alone [Super Earth] Nats season preview [We Love DC] Gingrich continues to campaign hard [at the zoo] We love Biden [slips again] Obama to ball with Lin [hoops] By geoff.greene

Ever unfollowed an over-tweeting co-worker/friend/family member/politician, only to have them call you on it because they track that sort of thing? If the answer is yes, now is the time to do it again. A spokesman for Twitter has admitted to the Telegraph that the service does indeed have a problem that causes …