DC is a special little swamp-town where politics are a 24/7 topic and the next apocalypse is just one vote away. The youths are never too young to get indoctrinated, and here are some things you may find in your little one’s Halloween bag around town.
Political Buttons
Whether it’s Bush (any of the three), Clinton (any of the two), Perot, or Mondale, you could end up with a tetanus filled bag of these gems.
Neighborhoods: Capitol Hill, Georgetown, Chevy Chase
LGBT Gear
Pro-gay marriage, or anti, you’re bound to get some solid literature or anything with a rainbow on it in the District.
Neighborhoods: Dupont/Logan Circle
Legalize It!
No shortage of headie gear this Halloween! With the recent controversy surrounding Prop 71, you could get anything from seeds, to hemp anklets, or special “candy” around town.
Neighborhoods: Adams Morgan, Columbia Heights, Takoma Park
Real Full Size Candy Bars
Because neighbors are really judgmental.
Neighborhoods: Chevy Chase, AU, Tenleytown, Georgetown
Pocket Constitutions
With the GOP in control of Congress, your grandmother likely sent you back with a stack of mini-Constitutions thanks to her continued $5 support of the Heritage Foundation. Spread the love (but just not free love, that’s probably banned by the Constitution)!
Neighborhoods: Capitol Hill
Vote for (insert some random ANC member here)
Sure we can’t vote in Congress, but no less than 2,398 people are always running for some ANC and seriously you guys, they will totally turn your neighborhood around this time!
Neighborhoods: District Proper
Nationals/Redskins Freebies
Bobbleheads, seat cushions, koozies, and foam fingers. Let’s face it…we don’t really need them anymore.
Neighborhoods: Navy Yard, Capitol Hill, Glover Park
FamousDC gear
Because Amos’s kids are tired of hoarding it all.
Neighborhoods: Capitol Hill
Floss
Well, maybe we are like every town after all.
Neighborhoods: (Ones you won’t be returning to next year)
Road Sodas (aka alcohol in solo cups)
Because we know #TheStruggleIsReal for DC parents.
Neighborhoods: Glover Park, Dupont Circle
Candy Corn
Someone sane in this household realized it’s the spawn of Satan and it needs to be returned to the depths of Mordor from hence it came!
Neighborhoods: The Shire
Trump 2016 Gear
We need to Make America(‘s children) Great Again. But mainly to mess with parents.
Neighborhoods: Georgetown, Glover Park, Capitol Hill
Fix DC Metro Petitions
Because seriously, it worked for like two days when the Pope was here. Coincidence?
Neighborhoods: Everywhere
Did we miss something? What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever received while trick-or-treating in DC? Let us know!
Happy Halloween!
