Hello all and welcome to the Ladies Who Lobby’s countdown to the election. Technically, this post was envisioned to mark one week left until election day–but there was this hurricane thing and we didn’t feel like it. Far too busy eating popcorn in our jammies.

Is anyone else excited for this to be over? Ready to watch an episode of Wheel of Fortune or Jeopardy (we swear, we aren’t 90) without constant political advertisements? Well, we are.

Do you know what we are particularly excited about? Things to go back to business as usual and people in the political business to stop being crazy. Has anyone noticed this election is making people nuttier than usual? More importantly, does anyone else have a particular coworker that is being kookier than usual? We do.

For example, on Monday our coworker, let’s call him Harvey, feels great. Harvey spent the weekend single handedly turning Virginia blue by going door-to-door in Arlington, shaking hands and kissing asses babies. On Monday, nothing can stop the Obama machine. We will have victory! There will be feasting and glory!

But then, then there is Tuesday. And, you see, there was this poll (or was it the “poll of polls?”). And this poll will be our doom. Obama is going to lose. Ohio is tightening. And democratic Floridians must be extinct because Romney is gaining there too. And don’t even talk to Harvey about Nevada. Basically, we are lost. Women and children first–we hear there will be cheap flights to Canada after the election.

And if you thought Tuesday was bad, just wait until Wednesday. On Wednesday not only is Obama going to lose, but the Senate will switch parties and California is going to break off the coastline and fall into the Pacific. And Hawaii will probably go with it. (We hear it was a suicide pact.)

And then there is Wednesday night, when Harvey plans to dress up as a polling station to try to convince Republicans to early vote and then burn their ballots.

But Lo! Thursday. Thursday is our salvation. Did you see that poll? Harvey is a bit of a Pollaholic (h/t David Brooks). We are saved! Because today the polls (or was it the “poll of polls?”) has Obama winning by 1000 percent. And then there is Nate Silver. We suspect Harvey has been sending Nate gift baskets for every new column predicting a Republican loss. Poor guy must have Harry and David pears bursting out of his office.

By Friday Harvey is militant. If you say “Republic….” you better hope you finish that phrase with “of China” and not “can” because you are the problem. You are playing into the hype. Don’t listen to them! He is Patton and he will save the election! Keep Calm and Carry On! To the weekend and the ground game!

So, enjoy the rest of the week, and count down the hours until the silly season is done with. We are almost there, but until then keep an eye on the polls (or the “poll of polls”)!

Oh… and try not to think too hard about the lame duck…