ESPN discovered that Alex Ovechkin is a Russian spy, EMRC predicts that smart phones are the new credit card, Lindsey Mask continues to  crush the social scene, Rochelle Behrens is Oprah famous,  Cam Newton and the Auburn Tigers are national champions,  pants are optional on the Metro, Congressional staff observed a moment of silence for the victims of the Arizona tragedy, Archie is still grumpy, CBS obtained the State of the Union seating chart, and RIP DC suitcase.