The NFL season is in full swing and Brad Kanus has agreed to join us for another year.

Another short one this week folks.  My daughter is only two weeks old and has developed a bad self-image and is now bulimic – I get no sleep.  It’s terrible. It’s worse than being a Cowboy’s fan.

I promise longer and funnier next week.  Hell, earlier too.

Here we go:

1.  I’m starting this week with Vick again because even though I labeled him “Football Jesus” last week, I didn’t start him.  Yep, I didn’t believe the hype.  The hype I perpetuated.  Shit.  He was the top fantasy earner this week and the only reason most people in Philly wake up these days.  The fat guy with the clip board looks like a genius right about now.

2.  Top receiver this year so far?  Austin Collie Dog.  There’s a guy across the field from name Reggie Wayne-ing – you may have heard of him.  Let’s hope you didn’t draft him very high. Somewhere in here is a joke about Forehead Manning, Collie and white-on-white crime.

3.  Carson Palmer looked like an Alan Grayson commercial on Sunday – bad, possibly handicapped.  They won, but I think it was in spite of his washed up effort.  If you’re a Bengals fan, and I don’t know why you would be, the sucking is just starting.  T.O. and 85 will let you know when it’s in full swing.

4. Can anyone tell me why Ben Rothletsgogetaburger’s bullshit suspension for not raping two women has given birth to the even bigger bullshit Charlie Batch feel good story?  It’s a batch of over-hyped crap if you ask me.   Nobody gets fantasy points for storylines.

5.  Steeler’s D = Fourth Running Back each week.

6. Adrian Peterson was busier than Braylon Edwards’ bartender on Sunday.  Grandpa Favre failed to hand the game to the Detroit Lions even though he was given an hour to do so.  I hope this was a sign that Peterson is shaking off the cobwebs.

7. Philip Rivers has quietly turned in a great three games so far this year.  For the life of me I can’t name one other fantasy option playing on that team right now.  My mind is fuzzy, but wasn’t it just a season back when you could start four Chargers every week and win?

8.  Cutler is having a decent season so far.  Kyle Orton is having a better one.

9.  About this Chiefs thing… The Broncos went 6-0 and last year.  Same division, same story.  Even the whole mediocre offense and good defense thing is the same.  Get off this bus before someone shits the onboard toilet.  Trust me.

10. Be honest.  When you heard there was a gunman running loose on the UT campus earlier this week, you went ahead and took OU with the points.  After all, when 911 is dialed in Austin, a backup gets a start on Saturday.  Texas will not finish in the top 25 this year.  Mac Brown will still get a huge bonus.

11. How is RC Cola not the official sponsor of the Florida – Alabama game every year?  I think they are missing a real opportunity here.  Bama smokes them making for an awkward moment at Flora-bama.

Byes this week – Chiefs, Cowboys, Vikings, Buccaneers.  Also known as “Things found in North America.”