#NATIONAL Watch people who want to go to Mars – one way; in China you can rent a boyfriend for $264 a day; Newsweek returns to print; Wake up to the smell of bacon, because, why not?; Lose an hour of sleep this weekend… But gain an hour of sunshine!; Um, awkward Russia; #DISTRICT That crazy freak accident on Capitol Hill this morning; Where are DC’s booming neighborhoods?; No more snow nooooooooo; DC’s getting a high line at the 11th street bridge; National Zoo baby LION CAM; #decriminalization; So, DC restaurants can now make + sell their own booze; Ben’s Chili Bowl takes on NoVa; Peak bloomin’; Did your favorite bar make THIS list?; Raiding the fridges of DC’s best chefs- YUM; Fiola Mare DC has arrived; When will STK actually open in DuPont?; Cava Grill looks to open in Chinatown over summer; Z-Kabob is coming to ADMO; #WASHINGTONINSIDER Lawmakers triumphed over lobbyists at the Congressional Hockey Challenge; CPAC… Cool; Spotted: Aretha Franklin, Ariana Grande & Janelle Monae at the W; Dalai Lama leads the Senate prayer; Roll Call decides they’re experts at SXSW; awkward Hill moments; NPR cares about your lunch, hill staff; #BIRTHDAY Birthday cheers: Leigh Munsil, Mike Haidet, Kate Bennett, Ellen Canale, Andrew Rafferty & Tom Sietsema; Marion Barry Jr. turns 78; #CONGRATS We’ll miss you, Carl Kasell; Congrats to @BrittMcHenry, who is headed to ESPN!; Amanda Cormier, Jason Plautz & Emma Roller join National Journal; #BYE Whiskey or beer this weekend? You decide.
Try not smiling while you’re watching this video of people dancing around DC to Pharrell Williams’ “Happy.” Just try it.
Things got a little snowy and a little Famous on Capitol Hill.
Le Diplomate is failing [just kidding it's making boatloads of cash]
Goodbye Snow photos [god we hope so]
Metro car door freezes open [that's brisk, baby]
WaPo expanding to China [yes that is a real thing, thanks Bezos]
Cherry Blossoms have a peak date [taking bets on the accuracy of said peak date]
Traffic + Secret Service, what a [pain in the ass]
Photo by number7cloud
Christopher Gindlesperger captured the true essence of a DC snowstorm in one powerful shot.
#NATIONAL Always get the bigger pizza; Or maybe never get the pizza; We found the best ever House of Cards tumblr; Bitcoin: nice while it lasted; Lebron-man; Seaworld still pissed about “Blackfish;” where’s our American flag tee shirt?; what’s going on with the Tea Party?; Oscars Sunday; Anchorman 3: ain’t gonna happen; Tesla’s about to get serious up in here; Bill Murray said it best, regarding our 2014 winter; this will thaw you out: pelican learns to fly; #THEDISTRICT Oof, TSA; Adorable: kid bonds with sea lion at the National Zoo; Oh look, DC is the top market for wealthy Milennials + Baby Boomers; Lupo Verde opens on 14th; 10 most anticipated spring restaurant openings; Is Kennedy Street the next hot DC spot?; lolol: the worst performing metro escalators of 2013 and 2014; Yummiest DC coffee spots; When & where to buy Girl Scout cookies; Richard Sandoval’s new Toro Toro to open next month; Red Apron Butchery opens in Penn Quarter; SPRING?? Garden District reopens 3/01; D.C. plans include gender-reassignment surgeries; CapMac is back on the streets; Lisa De Pasquale book launch party; Fabio Trabocchi’s Italian seafood spot debuts on the Georgetown waterfront; The best happy hours in Shaw and Bloomingdale: Possible fare hikes, new routes to Southwest for @DCCirculator; #WASHINGTONINSIDER Brian Johnson is swamped #TaxReform; So is Sarah Swineheart; Who is having a better week: Howard Mortman or Seth Rogen?; ”It’s boner.”;Ezra Klein and Matthew Yglesias hang out at Lauriol Plaza; Nancy & Paul Pelosi ‘take back the night’ at JT; Dave Tate is the man; Lobbyists vs. Lawmakers: go to the Congressional Hockey Challenge next week, because 1. Hon. John Kerry vs. Brad Dayspring AND 2. it’s for an excellent cause; Marion Barry live tweeted Scandal; Rep. Jared Polis is getting a GQ makeover; #SUCKS Feel Better, @StephFont; Get better Dan; #BIRTHDAY Tell Andrew Fimka happy birthday today; Happy Birthday Elle Imperiale; Speaking of birthdays, make sure you tell these fine folks congrats on being another year older: Tobias Sellier, Christine Kim, Mat Pierson, Joe Bretell, Kevin Madden, Cheryl Jaeger, Lindsay Casale, Emily Miller and Patrick Gavin; HBD Blake Waggoner, Hadas Gold, Trey Graham, Tyler Houlton, Vicki Diez & Erica Goldman; #CONGRATULATIONS Congratulations time!; Happy pre-Anniversary to Ryan and Karen Howell; Tell Robert Holleyman congratulations on his appointment to Deputy USTR; Lindsey Drew is rocking a new gig at MasterCard; Lauren Culbertson and Jen Voss became Story Partners; David Powers is now Senior Counsel at the Republican National Committee; if Bryan Avondoglio keeps getting promoted, will he soon be SPEAKER?; Congratulations to Molly and Matt Haase on the birth of their little girl Betsy; Timothy B. Lee follows Ezra Klein to Vox; Jason Zengerle joins The New Republic as a senior editor; Yochi Dreazen gets promoted; Josh Barro joins NYT; BloombergView.com relaunches; Domenico Montanaro heads to PBS; Tim Carmody and David Sims join The Wire; Scott Havens jumps to TIME; Madhulika Sikka celebrates her new book; @woodruffbets joins the @dcexaminer; #BYE We promise it will warm up, go outside and get moving.
This roundup brought to you by SP+KC, NoLongerFamous, RedneckGenius and Marie.
We could not be any more serious. This is amazing. Read below.
h/t Almost Famous
“BiteLabs grows meat from celebrity tissue samples and uses it to make artisanal salami.” So proclaims the copy on BiteLabs.org, right under an all-caps call to action: EAT CELEBRITY MEAT. The site proposes taking actual tissue samples of celebrities—specifically, James Franco, Kanye West, Jennifer Lawrence, and Ellen DeGeneres—and growing their cloned meat for use in a marketable salami blend. …”
So they sound serious. We’re pretty sure right now Kanye is like: